Notes from The Skank Bowl...

...aka Jacksonville Municipal Stadium aka The Gator Bowl aka The World's Largest Outdoor Cocktail Party, which incidentally is the most appropriate title. This trip was probably the worst I road game trip I can recall, including the time I went to Neyland Stadium and almost got into a physical altercation with a UT fan (no surprise there!) That also includes the time I went to Oxford and we LOST to Ole Miss (big surprise there!) So you can probably deduce that more than the loss is to blame.

But before I jump in head first, I have to explain the whole "Young Girl" sitch. It's kind of an ongoing joke with my parents (okay really just my dad but that sounds bad and it's nothing like that I assure you!) We were all sittin around, playin dominoes, listenin to music when we heard that song. Me and my hubby couldn't believe this song is still in circulation considering the times (too many examples to link). If you did your homework, then you will note that the words of that song go something like "better run, girl, you're much too young girl" or "so hurry home to your momma...before we go too far" Is it just me or can you not believe that song is still on the radio?!?!? Wouldn't you know we heard it again on satellite radio during our trip to Florida last weekend? We quickly realized we were mistakenly listening to Playboy channel's pedophile station and changed it. No, that last sentence was a test to see if you were paying attention. However, we really did hear the song and we had my dad laughing so hard with our thoughts on the song. He thinks we're blowing it all out of proportion (okay, we kinda did just for kicks) but then I found the original video and decided that Gary Puckett is definitely a perv/freak, or at least he was. And while I was browsing youtube, I found a video of him performing the song (wait for this....) at Epcot. You just can't make this stuff up.

Now onto football... Alabama obviously did not study my points to the game. Otherwise, they would have known that you have to outscore the other team... works every time! I literally chanted "no huddle, no huddle" about half-way through the 1st quarter but no one joined me. In fact, my husband pretended he didn't know me. My cheering did clearly draw attention from the crowd as I'm pretty sure I heard some drunkard mumble something about "that little sober girl" and "doesn't she know this is a cocktail party?!?!" I would love to say that our team and fans fought the good fight and came out on the losing end but such was not the case... unless River City Showdown really meant drinking competition. In that case, the giant golden keg goes to the Sabanation! Lest anyone thinks I have jumped ship, let me assure you that our experiences at BDS (or any college stadium for that matter) are nothing like that. It just seems that the sober UA fans (excluding us) didn't make the trip. FSU fans didn't bowl me over with their class and dignity, either. That reminds me... here's an unsolicited fashion tip: This is not a dress. It is a shirt so please wear pants. Bonus fashion tip: Ba-donka-donks by nature don't fit into a size 2. Indeed, that little slit will give way.

I'm surprised at how easy the media has been on Bama this week. There's some obvious problems with the offense that I personally believe could be corrected, yet they have not been so far. I have confidence in the coaching staff but am a little bewildered at some of their choices. And I'll go ahead and say it, for $4 mill I want to see a little theatrics. You know--a little jumpin, a little shoutin', a little grabbin' of the facemasks. $3.9 mill can be purely coaching but throw us a friggin' bone and give us $100,000 worth of inspiration... which of course brings me to this. You're welcome.

Now it's not all Saban's fault. I am convinced that John Parker Wilson is a junkie-- an adrenaline junkie! He once told me (because you know we're tight and all) "hey, it's sooooo much cooler if you come from behind to win. I mean, I look so much cooler when I do it that way." [tosses Bama bangs to the side] "Oh no, I can't change..." [cue Freebird]

So there's an insiders look at the collapse of a rockin' 3-0 season. Being 3-2 sucks, doesn't it? Oh if only there was anyone else out there that was 3-2....