Chickity-Check Yo Self

Hopefully you've continued to read about the Lane Kiffin saga somewhere (since I haven't been able to stay on top of it for you here at Steph's Other Space) because it is good stuff. If not, here's a spot-on recap by Kevin Scarbinsky that oughta bring you up to speed. There's really nothing more for me to add because I agree 100% with Scarbo. But I will say this...that's some mighty big talk for a kid named Lane with a father named Monte.

Famous Monte(y) Montage:

I'll find time to post this...

...meanwhile, I suggest Mt. Cody find a new girlfriend! :) We HEART you, Terrence!

Tell me something I didn't know...

This just confirms what I already knew: 2007's seniors were a joke. Now, if I could just find out if DJ Hall really did knock up JPW's girlfriend.... Hop to it, Ian!

Moonshine, they're talking about moonshine (Don't feel bad, Lane, it took me a while to catch on too!)

I just think this is funny (which I'm pretty sure is okay because it's still UT, even without Phat Phil.)

To the victor goes the spoils...

I'd like to dedicate this to Stacy and Holly:



I believe in 36-0... and love it!

Let me be clear...

... I don't care what he wears, so long as he is still our coach. (And winning... let's not forget winning.) But wow! That sweater is, um, bold to say the least.

Nick Saban 11/24/08 Press Conference Pt. 1

Roll Tide...

PS: It is in fact Iron Bowl week so look for completely gratuitous Alabama football posts. Like you've got anything better to do. Hmmmmph.

Whew... that was close!

Do you guys remember when UA basically hired Rich Rodriquez and then he backed out (purportedly after reading some of the bigoted posts all over the Bama boards about his Hispanic heritage... not to mention his wife)?!? Well, turns out we dodged a bullet so a big thanks to those ig-no-ray-mooses, and I mean that from the bottom of my heart. Anyway, this all reminds me of a funny pic we took the night the news broke that Rich-Rod would be our new coach (note Crabman's enthusiasm... har. har.):


I remember feeling so low when he officially announced he was staying at West Virginia. All the pundits, et al (read: I'm actually talking about obnoxious rival fans) went on and on about how we would never find a coach, no one wants to coach us bunch o' lunatics, yada yada. All I got to say is:

"And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose."

Romans 8:28

(Sound familiar to any of you Bama fans?)

Almost forgot!

I got carried away with all my research into the LSU band's playlist, etc (and by "etc" I mean the debate about whether or not them playing the song commonly referred to as "Neck" is racist and a swipe at the historic black college community) and almost forgot to mention that the LSU band actually played this... can you tell what that is?




Here's a clue:



Can you believe it???

Tit, meet Tat

Sorry in advance that this post won't be as scintillating as the title would suggest...

Well, that picture really does tell the story... the whole story. Unfortunately/fortunately (however you want to look at it), my trip to the infamous Baton Rouge just didn't live up to the hype. Now mind you, I'm not talking about the actual football experience... that part was great and a much better game than anyone could have ever imagined (though let me be clear that it was my preference for Bama to stomp them early and often so that we could make our way over to the good guys section and really enjoy the win but I'll take that win nonetheless!) Perhaps because the legendary Death Valley was so built up in my own mind, it just seemed to fall short. I mean, the stories of that place are mythic in proportion. I think I truly expected to see ragin' cajuns swinging from giant old oak trees hissing "Tiger bait, tiger bait, TIGER BAIT!" or maybe even real, live (so to speak) vampires rising up from purple-n-gold coffins in some whacky attempt to put the voodoo on us. Alas, it was tame. Very tame. Infinitely tamer than those fans who represented the storied Lousiana State University in Tuscaloosa last year. Remember this? Not even a pimp suit in sight this year. (Apparently even more went down in T'town last year as I read in a Baton Rouge newspaper that some "boorish" LSU fans took a leak on Bear Bryant's statue outside our stadium. Now as if that's not "boorish" enough, take a look at where that statue stands and imagine it on a gameday in terms of people. I can't imagine they didn't get arrested for indecent exposure but then I realized there's probably some sort of loophole for LSU fans... can anyone say "clogged court system"?) Anyway, I theorize there must have been some sort of beer-drinking contest or something for LSU's allotment of tickets to last year's game (I assure you it wasn't an essay contest) because they sure sent some doozies. Imagine my surprise/disappointment when I learned there really wasn't 90,000+ more just like them back in Baton Rouge. That's bad for funny stories here on Steph's Other Space but I think overwhelmingly good for mankind.

So, since I don't have a lot of material (and my husband, parents, and sister have all heard my "good stuff" already), I'll just post a few random tidbits from my rendezvous at the ole Red Stick.

1. The LSU band really is full of sights and sounds to behold. I'm being serious. They play the whole time, before kickoff and even beyond the bitter end. I was equally impressed with the vast number of cheers the LSU faithful have memorized as well as their willingness to participate... on many levels. First, not every fan base is willing to go all out in cheering on the home team, my beloved Crimson nation included (not always, but definitely sometimes.) Second, I would have a hard time believing they have the mental acuity to remember all those cheers (there must be at least 40 of 'em) if I had not seen it myself. There are hand motions and everything. (Cost of regular-priced tickets: $55. Watching old-white-guy season ticket holders participate during that song: Priceless.) Plus, this part was pretty cool (it's no Dixieland Delight but what they lack in music quality, they make up for in enthusiasm!) Hmmm, upon further research, now I wonder what they were shouting at us during this song.

2. Tiger Stadium is really just an oversized Cramton Bowl (those from The Gump will get the reference.) Seriously. I even heard the LSU fans complaining about their stadium's amenities in relation to the ticket prices. There was some construction going on outside so I imagine they are trying to make some upgrades but really it needs an ultimate makeover. I'm not trying to be snooty... it was just a little surprising, that's all. But in so many ways, it suits them just perfectly (as does Less Miles!)

3. The PA dude actually announced that the sun had set and it was nighttime in Baton Rouge. Hellllllllllooooooooo Captain Obvious! I believe they may also hold beer-drinking contests for the PA job* as it appeared they had given the mike to a fan, just any ole fan with a propensity to talk too much during a game ("Scott is out over the LSU forty--correction, the Alabama forty-- for a gain of two yards... boy, that was a tough two yards." And that's much closer to an actual quote from Saturday rather than a paraphrase.) Again, it definitely wasn't an essay contest that won him the job.

*Insert Kenny Stabler joke here but keep in mind Stabler is our color analyst, not the public announcer at Bryant-Denny Stadium, and besides... Stabler could/would be knee-deep in a pitcher of margaritas and still sound more knowledgeable than this guy.

4. I wasted several one-liners during the game because we were in fact severely outnumbered and I rather enjoy the use of all of my extremities. Still, I could NOT resist quietly mumbling "you can do it!" after the LSU alma mater during the pregame show. Pee-paw probably didn't hear me and wouldn't have really gotten the reference anyway but I imagine if I was in the Bama section, I would have shouted it for all to hear and subsequently been named the MVP of the Bama section. Nah, too old? Oh, who am I kiddin'... The Waterboy never gets old, especially when you're in Baton Rouge. Which reminds me, if they hate Nick Saban so much, what do they think of Adam Sandler?!?! Dare I ask...

5. Finally, below is a pic of the actual wristband for the gameday shuttle we rode from The Sheraton downtown to the stadium. (Total random sidenote: I saw this lady at The Sheraton and commented that I hoped to be just like her someday...) Anyway, an LSU fan commented to me that they could have at least made the wristbands in some color other than red and white but I told her not to worry, it appeared they let LSU pick the beer logo...

As far as the actual game went, I'm not surprised it was so tight. I thought it seemed like a mirror image of the game in Tuscaloosa last year where ultimately the best team won but the opposition sure gave it their all. Yeah, the refs made some questionable calls or non-calls in the game but I believe that's where the tit meets the tat. I know from experience that it was a heartbreak for the loser, but does anybody remember how the rest of the season turned out for the winner??? I just can't seem to put my pointed index finger on it...

PS: Nice read from The New York Times.

Declare yourself!

Okay, I've GOT to go get ready for my trip and shore up loose ends on the homefront before I hit the road but I wanted to see if you guys and gals would humor me while I'm on the road. I'm curious to know more about my meager readership (though I was really movin'n'groovin' on the ole blog meter when I first posted that Texas Tech photo... people from all over this great country were apparently quite interested in why Tech's fan were so serious!) So, do me this favor and declare yourself in the comments section with a big "Roll Tide" (good!) or "War Eagle..." (bad!) or "Geaux Tigers!" (ugly) here. As always, you can even do it anonymously (I realize some people might be a little ashamed at this point) but I expect 100% participation seeing as EVERYONE has a preference. Sure, only 70% of the population voted on Tuesday in a historic turnout but I'm talking about college football, not electing the leader of the free world. Priorities, people! :)



PS: Cast a vote on the poll, too!

File this under "Craziness That Is My Life"

I will make this quick because boyoboy do I have a lot to do over the next 36 hours. Turns out I'm going to Baton Rouge! I know, are you friggin' kiddin' me?!?!? It looks like I'll have regular-priced tickets sitting next to an Alabama fan... how sweet is that? (Ask me AFTER the game I suppose!) Anyway, after much gnashing of teeth, it turns out Plumberboy will stay home and I'll make the trip with my dad (probably safer because he's always packin heat.) Not that it won't be fun with my dad (football is definitely our thing) but I would love to have a getaway with my husband. Alas, this is the most responsible, adult-like (read: ridiculously mature/old/boring for our age) thing to do. There were several things that factored into the decision, not the least of which is our two children behaving like hooligans over the past month. They are exhausted, thus out-of-control, so we think it's best for them to stay home for the weekend. Obviously they can't stay home by themselves and if you've been following me here at Steph's Other Space then you know who's turn it is to go (if not, you can brief yourself here.) Clemson-Schmemson... I'm going to Death Valley!!!! Full report upon my return so long as I actually make a return. If not then at least one parent has been left behind to care for the kiddos...

Note to self: Add provision to my will for someone to help Plumberboy dress the kids each day, a "clothing godmother" so to speak. Be sure to have it signed, witnessed, and notorized before Saturday at 2:30 PM CST.

Why so serious?

Regardless of who Texas Tech plays from this point forward, I will not be rooting for them to win. (Apologies to my sis-in-law who has a dear friend that played at Tech) Below is a pic of their student section on Saturday night vs. Texas... bunch of FA-REAKS!

And that's not even mentioning their coach. Dang, momma (in my best Ellen Page Shopping with Virginiaca SNL sketch voice)... I'd freakin' love to play Tech.

PS: To the myriad of Texas Tech fans and/or folks curious about the freakshow in Lubbock who found my blog via google, I actually have no idea why they are paying homage to Heath Ledger at a football game. I think it may have something to do with a madman Leach formation known as "The Joker" but that is purely conjecture at this point. In all honesty, I think they are just anarchists. Check out the header... this is a Bama blog so I'm not that well-versed in the Red Raiders. Sorry to disappoint! By the way, any of y'all got a couple tickets to the UA-LSU game (that you'd part with at regular price) per chance? Hey, I'm nothing if not opportunistic. Thanks for stopping by! Leave a comment... AND VOTE MCCAIN-PALIN!

Yet another rip-off:

I know I'm always bumming posts off of Ian Rapoport but this pic was too good NOT to post here. I may just make it my profile pic. :)

(I know some Aubs may deduce that Nick Saban is kneeing Brandon Deaderick in the nads in this pic but he's actually initiating a chest bump with the player. Hmm... didn't know "Coach Satan" did those sort of things, did you???)

I'm just sayin'

I REALLY want to go to Athens on Saturday. It's going to be hard on the ole ticker to not be there in person. I know, it's totally 100% illogical for me to go between the kids, dogs, Sunday school commitments, energy, travel costs, etc but it will seriously be hard for me to not be there. Does anybody feel sorry for me yet? Wow, tough crowd. So, I'm thinking about emailing one of the local talk radios or blogs or whatever and offer to do a little on-the-scene reporting in exchange for a ticket, press pass, ride in the back of a pickup truck there and back (all in one day because I really need to be back home come Sunday morning.) I mean, I'm sure I can find somebody to hang out with Miss Sassy or she can just learn how to hang out here by herself... which is going to happen someday anyway. Or she can just go to the game with me. (Seeing eye dog anyone?) I figure I can be in and out of Athens in 14-16 hours or so, right?!?!

Much ado about something...

Well, it's a little (lot!) hectic around here today but I hated to not check in here two days in a row even though there's a zillion other things that need tending to. Anyway, I'm not sure where I should begin. There's always something political to talk about these days along with the way we're gettin' hosed at the pump (oil under a hundred bucks a barrel does not four dollars a gallon make!) but really all I have on tap that is even mildly entertaining is my thoughts/ponderations from Saturday's UA-WKU game. So without further ado (can you believe I worked "ado" into my blog twice--make that three--times?!? Apparently it's technically "without further adieu" but it appears that "ado" is quite acceptable in today's English-American vernacular. So there you go... plus that's technically four times now, seven counting the alternate spelling...see below.)
Okay, truly without any further ado/adieu...

1. From the 3rd level of the west (old) upper deck of Bryant-Denny Stadium, John Parker Wilson appears to be wearing saddle shoes. I'm sure it's some combination of athletic tape and black cleats but the thought makes me chuckle. You know, I just have a mental image of the grand poobah of Bama Bangs prancing around out there in saddle shoes... and that's funny. If I squint real hard, his pants look like they are made from seersucker.

2. Apparently, Western Kentucky University borrowed their mascot from the local blood bank. Believe me, it's even less impressive in person. But apparently he/she is famous!

3. After a conspicuous absence, the guys in the PA booth finally gave us a little Dixieland Delight this weekend. It was even more awesome than usually because my yankee (seriously yankee) MIL heed-and-hawed right along with the rest of us.

4. Big Al actually crowd-surfed from the field of play all the way up to the top of the student section (um, 60 or 70 rows?) which may not sound like much until you stop to consider that he was in fact in the student section of the self-proclaimed drinking school with a football problem. At a night game. Sure, he was wearing a form of large protective head gear but that still deserves a medal for bravery or something. Or a free Denny dog (estimated value: $6--yes SIX! Apparently someone thinks the Crimson Nation is made of money.)

5. Some dweeb sat behind us and cheered obnoxiously enthusiastically for Julio Jones and Javier Arenas except that he pronounced it "Jew-leo" and "Jah-vee-air" all night. He cracked himself up and apparently it never got old to him. Me thinks he's not really a Bammer but rather another fan who lost a bet and, for some reason or another, it's taken him approximately six years (probably closer to seven) to make good on it.

6. Overall, our band is doing much better this year. They're more inclined to actually march off the field instead of scatter in a thousand different directions like little ants so they are slowly but surely making progress towards looking as good as they sound. And they sound dang good with their new repertoire too, which includes this. Sa-weet! (For the record, I did not sing all of Rammer Jammer this time because it seems like overkill for a Sunbelt conference team. I did chime in on "Give 'em hell Alabama". Just keepin' it real.)

Well, sorry folks, that's it for now. So what's all the "ado" in our household? Well, Ricky Bobby's birthday is tomorrow (8... say it ain't so!) and there's much preparation involved per our family traditions. Plus, Plumberboy is recovering from his trip to New York and our grass needs cutting, yada, yada. And then there's this:

Any guesses as to what this means?

PS: That's not me in the background.

Oh-kNOwshon-he-di'nt!

Let's hope this dude (one Mr. Knowshon Moreno) gets arrested before his game with us. I kid, I kid (sort of.) Seriously, is this pic doctored? Good grief, I hope so! I think maybe so because he seems out of proportion with the other player. Seriously, I hope it's a hoax.

Well, a big thanks to Lacey who commented on my last post! (So did my husband and my dad but they are kind of obligated to do so... it's contractual.) I have lots of other thoughts on the subject but if I continue to post them without any break in topic then I will surely lose what little audience I have left. But rest assured it won't be long before I read another article or blog entry that forces me to fire off another post. Even if no one in the world ever read it, I have to get those things off my chest or I shall surely implode. There are probably plenty of you who wouldn't find that a particular loss but I don't think it's in my kids' best interest. Do you know how ill-suited my husband is to dress them on a daily basis? (Yes, I still guide my 2nd grader with his clothes. He needs all the help he can get.)

So, do you really care what I thought about the Tulane game? I think not. If I had to sum it up in a singular thought, I guess I'd go with this: If a really bad, ugly game still results in a two-touchdown win (albeit over a second-tier program) then you really are a different team from last year.

Any other thoughts? I guess just that 7 years ago today our country was a very different place. May God continue to watch over my family, my country, His People since we never know what's right around the corner. As I read on a bumper sticker this weekend "Bless God, America!"

Dude...

...football season starts next month. Ugh. Wow.

Sorry, but that's about it from me for now. I have tons of good pics from our beach trip (courtesy of Peepaparazzi) but I'll have to post them later. I've been way too busy acquiring school supplies (piece-by-piece, mind you) for 300+ kids... and painting a full-grown boxer dog's toenails.

Thoughts and prayers...

Thanks be to God because it is raining as I type (and sounds so good!) I know I probably seem like some sort of crazy person obsessing about the rain but an ongoing severe drought is the last thing this sagging economy needs. Although you would never know that there is a recession slump here as Plumberboy remains so busy. He's doing lots of work in the "field" where it is good and hot... welcome home I suppose!

Anyway, check out Crosby's page and please add his mom, Meredith, to your prayer list. She is now anxiously awaiting results from her own biopsy. I feel so bad for this family as they have been through so much already. I somewhat know what it feels like to be stuck in a vicious circle of bad news and worry. And I also know there are all sorts of little saying about not worrying if you're praying, etc but those were obviously said by people who didn't have a sick kid or a sick spouse. It's impossible not to worry with the frail hearts and flesh that God gave us for this world but it is possible to have a peace that surpasses understanding. I'm praying that for Team Nathaniel!

One last thing, yes I am aware of Jimmy Johns situation at Alabama. What more can I say? I've acknowledged many times on this very blog that our team is full of thugs who need to move on. It looks like Johns will be doing just that (on the taxpayers' dime)... and what a waste it is. My kids will never have the raw talent he had but he just goes and throws his all away. (As a sidenote, if memory serves me correctly, Jimmy Johns is a parent himself.) Doesn't he know that at the very least he could have successfully sold insurance in this state for the rest of his life? Don't follow in his footsteps, Baby Ro! (And no, that's not a code name for one of my younguns.)

PS: Upon reading some of today's articles, I'm guardedly optimistic that Johns' behavior was in no way condoned by his teammates seeing as he took great measures to hide his secret. On the other hand, his frat boy customers knew exactly who they were dealing with. Typical. Seriously, typical.

ADDENDUM: Apparently Jimmy Johns could have tried just a little harder to hide his side job. The police report indicates Johns sold dope in the parking lot of the football complex!!! But in fairness to Saban, those deals went down last week and can you imagine the uproar if Saban had kicked Johns off the team just for looking out his office window, seeing Jimmy Johns talking to a white dude, and assuming he must be a drug dealer. Much thanks to Mr. Johns for putting us in this situation. Har.

Pride on 3, Pride on 3 (and Mommas, don't let your babies grow up to be Rashad Johnson)

I have so many other things I need to be doing but I just had to comment on a couple of stories today. First, did any of you see The Biggest Loser last night? If so, did you cry? That is a topic of debate amongst me and some of my family members as I was chastised for laughing at Shultzy & Co (aka the "blue" team) last night. Don't get me wrong, I don't have a problem with a man crying and I personally find that show touching on a regular basis. Furthermore, I don't fault any contest for becoming so emotionally invested during the process. But last night I could not help but laugh as Roger Shultz and his macho teammates cried like babies on the show. And they obviously made no attempt to hold it in whatsoever. Good stuff. Forget ever-shrinking waistbands and disappearing pounds. Never before has it been so obvious that this team is trained by Bob.

Okay, that's one Bama football topic down...one to go. Yesterday was a day that tries men's crimson souls. Between Schultz's bicep tat and potty mouth to Nick Saban's press conference, I found myself begging them to please give me something to work with. As if the past decade hasn't given our rivals plenty of fodder, Nick Saban had to go and say something like this. Let me use these humble blog as a forum on which to personally denounce such ridiculous comments. As some may remember, I defended his reference of Pearl Harbor and 9/11 a while back but I cannot do the same in this situation. As a mother, I can think of at least 100 way I could be more pleased than if my kids grew up to make the kind of decisions Rashad Johnson has made over the past few days but for brevity's sake, I'll narrow it down to three. First, I would be more pleased with my sons if they went to bed at a decent hour. Rashad Johnson was out at a bar at 3 AM. Nothing good happens after midnight, 1 AM tops. Second, I would be more pleased if they weren't at a bar at all. Sure, he's of legal age to consume alcohol but it's probably better for an elite athlete to abstain from alcoholic beverages all together. I'm the most pleased if they just don't drink period. But if they simply must drink, be a better steward of your money and drink at home. It's safer and has got to be cheaper...though in fairness to Rashad, a Bama football player probably hasn't paid for his own drinks since 1925. Thirdly, (is that a word? Who cares? Check out the header... you're in my world now, grandma.) If for some reason you do encounter the po-po police, by all means cease and desist. They usually say things like "Stop! Police! Don't resist!" so be sure you have your listening ears on. If necessary, call a lawyer ASAP but for goodness' sake don't flail your arms in the air and continue to punch. That's pretty much the definition of resisting arrest. And a really good way to end up shot. Or tased. Or both.

But don't take this all too harshly, Rashad... just so you know, donning that Alabama football jersey probably is #2 on my kid's "Top 10 Ways to Please My Overbearing Mother" list.

PS-- If you read to the end of that linked article (like I just did), then you know it's only a matter of time before the entire UA student body floods the TPD's fax machines with statements in Rashad Johnson's defense. Good gravy.

Too bad...

...Rashad Johnson never showed this kind of fight during a game! I kid, I kid. Sorry folks, I just don't have much to offer after this one or Jeremy Elder's recent Al Capone impersonation. It's a hard knock life, word!

I do expect Nick Saban to handle these situations but perhaps not to everyone's liking. Hopefully Nick Saban is more Gene Stallings than Mike Shula. And I suspect he is, which means he may buy Rashad Johnson an ice cream cone but he'll be eating it through a new bodily orifice.

PS: The real problem with the UA football program (and the entire student population in general) is the hallowed Strip. Every SEC college town could boast it's a drinking town with a football problem but only T'town has considered putting that slogan on their welcome signs!